Let's Talk about Money

When it comes to what couples fight about, money is the number one thing couples argue about. Financial issues can take its toll on a relationship and arguments about money are the leading cause of divorce. Long before they realize they're living beyond their means, couples tend to battle about abusing credit cards, conflicting priorities, and different philosophies about spending, saving, and investing their money. When couples fight over money they tend to blame each other and anger and resentment build.
Money is a touchy topic for most couples. There is no "right" or "wrong" way to deal with issues such as unequal assets, layoffs from work, and credit card debt. Disagreements about finances are usually not really about money but about our dreams, fears, and insecurities. Our relationship with money starts in childhood. Everyone has a story about money which includes myths, misconceptions, and habits. When our histories, attitudes, and beliefs about money collide with our partner, sparks can fly. If this "Us against each other" mindset doesn't change to a "Us against the problem," high-conflict can become perpetual and a source of chronic tension in a relationship. Learning how to talk about finances is a critical way for couples to protect their relationship and strengthen it.
This book brings real-life stories of couples who have successfully navigated these issues and have achieved financial health. It teaches couples the skills needed to recover quickly from hurt and miscommunication and shows them how to be emotionally attuned to one another, rather than avoiding discussing money or experiencing perpetual tension or high conflict about finances.

Terry Gaspard MSW, LICSW, is a licensed therapist and writer. She has written two award-winning books, Daughters of Divorce (co-authored with her daughter; Sourcebooks, 2016), which was the winner of The Best Book Award for "Self Help Relationships" and The Silver Medal Independent Publisher's Award, and The Remarriage Manual (Sounds True, 2020), which won the American Book Fest's 2022 Best Book Award in the category of Self-Help Relationships and the 2022 Independent Publisher Award in Gold for Self Help. Gaspard is also a regular contributor to patheos.com, marriage.com, The Good Men Project, and other outlets. She has been published in The Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, the Washington Post, with "How to Introduce Your Kids to Your First Love After Divorce," on May 28, 2021, and "How to Deal with a Breakup During Pregnancy" on Huffington Post, on August 11, 2022. I also contributed to articles on AARP,HuffingtonPost.com, USA TODAY FLORIDA, DebtReductionServices.org, TheExit.com, marriage.com, and Bustle.com. She lives in Rhode Island with her second husband and can be found online at movingpastdivorce.com.