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By viewing romantic love as an attachment bond, Clare Rosoman incorporates emotionally focused therapy (EFT) and attachment theory to provide evidence-based tools in navigating close relationships and managing the pain of relationship loss. Beginning with a foreword from Veronica Kallos-Lilly, this book firstly explores how attachment themes show up in relationship dynamics, creating either security or insecurity, before looking at how relationships go wrong. Chapters then focus on creating a new narrative for this loss of connection, helping readers learn about their own attachment strategies and how to work through pain, anger, and grief. The last part focuses on helping readers learn how to forgive, let go, build security within themselves, and implement these strategies in future relationships. Addressing all forms of relationships, including family and friendship losses, LGBTQ+ couples, and references to cultural humility, this accessible and empathetic guide is written for both therapists and their clients to help them learn from their experiences and build the ability to be a resource for themselves. It is essential reading for EFT therapists as well as couple, marriage, and family therapists.
Clare Rosoman is a clinical psychologist, and EFT therapist and trainer based in Queensland, Australia.
Part I: Taking Stock- Where am I now and how did I get here? 1. Why does it hurt so much? 2. Where did it all go wrong? Part II: Processing Pain - What can I learn and how can I grow? 3. Learning about your own attachment strategies 4. Anger & Attachment 5. Grief & Attachment Part III: Looking forward - What's next for me? 6. Acceptance & Detaching 7. Earning security with yourself 8. Building security in future relationships
