Nose Down, Eyes Up

At forty-seven, Gil is the world's oldest twenty-two-year-old man, living in relative contentment with his four dogs, including the alpha, Jimmy. When he stumbles upon Jimmy delivering lectures on canine manipulative techniques to the rest of the dogs in the neighborhood, Gil's not particularly surprised, and his eyes light up with dollar signs. But their money-making venture has barely begun when chatty canine Jimmy realizes the shocking truth: He's adopted. And not only is Gil not his real father, they're not even the same species. In the identity crisis that ensues, Gil hears the last thing he wants his favorite dog to say: Jimmy wants to be reunited with his birth mother, a bitch owned by Gil's sexy ex-wife, now remarried and living in Malibu. Could things get worse? Apparently, yes.

Emmy Award—winning writer Merrill Markoe has authored three books of humorous essays and the novels Walking in Circles Before Lying Down and It's My F---ing Birthday and co-authored (with Andy Prieboy) the novel The Psycho Ex Game. An overly long biographical résumé can be found at www.merillmarkoe.com. She lives in Los Angeles with four dogs and a man.